Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Making time (or not) to write

I keep thinking about that entry I want to write... the one about our last two days on vacation, and the crazy experience in Knoxville, and then I think "I don't have time!"

Of course I don't have time, in between work and TKD and worrying about this and that and everything else, and stomach viruses, and children who don't (or do) get picked up from school, and fundraisers (ack!), and other things I have to write.

Time doesn't appear on its own. I have to MAKE time to write. Or else I won't write. Because when I have a few precious moments to myself, I want to sleep, or passively stare at a screen and turn my brain off. So I have to tell someone that I will get it done so that I feel compelled to meet my self-imposed deadline.

I will write that story this weekend.

Because after that I have other things to say.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Dear Grains: It's over.

And white potatoes and refined sugar, listen up.

I'm done. I'm breaking up with you.

I've had it with the blood sugar swings (and accompanying mood swings), the sluggishness, the belly fat I can't get rid of despite obsessive calorie counting, and the mid-day slump.

I want to be able to think and behave like a rational, sane human being when I'm hungry.

You're right, we'll probably have a fling every now and then, but you're not moving back in, so don't try to tempt me with your comforting sweetness. I'll get my comfort elsewhere.

Pasta, you know I'll miss you most of all, but I just can't take it anymore. Good-bye.

(Note to readers: I'm not "doing" Atkins, or South Beach, or Paleo, or anything else in particular... for now I'm just getting rid of the foods that I already know cause me problems and eating pretty much whatever I want otherwise.)

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Happy Birthday to the original TKDMom

She and my little sister started this whole crazy TKD family thing, and I'm so grateful.

Happy birthday to the woman who taught me how to appreciate my own talents, how to make a good roux, and how to change a diaper.

Happy birthday to the woman who stood by me in all the darkest times of my life... and the most joyful.

Happy birthday to the woman who celebrated my successes, pushed me to reach my goals, and wiped my tears when I fell.

Happy birthday to the woman who showed me the value of generosity, and affection, and real love, and friendship, and loyalty, and courage, and faith.

Happy birthday to the strongest, bravest, smartest woman I know.

I love you Mom!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

The Home Stretch

Sort of. When you've been studying something for nearly two and a half years already, 6 months doesn't seem all that long.

I received my brown decided belt last Thursday night. That means I have only one color left (two belts, red recommended and red decided) before I move into black belt territory.

I'm nervous! I still feel so clueless. I've learned so much, but I still feel lost at times. I still struggle with certain techniques.

Last night I got completely trounced in sparring by a little kid half my size. Granted, he was a black belt (and a quick, agile little ball of fury), BUT STILL. It's embarrassing.

This is the most time and effort and energy I think I've ever spent on something I wasn't good at right away. If I'm not naturally good at something, I don't want to do it. Sticking with TKD (especially weapons and sparring) is teaching me more about dedication and commitment, about committing to a goal even when it isn't always fun. My next goal is to find the discipline within myself to spend even more time on the parts I'm struggling with, because without that work, I won't feel ready to be a black belt.